Closure

I was stubborn and fought the news yesterday. I told them I wanted to be sure and even though they felt I was holding on too much, they were ok with me taking another lab today.

My beta was 84. It went up...but by only four numbers. The previous went up, by only three numbers. Our little baby just can't do it.

I'm going to call Dr. Figge's office, Dr. Lang's office, and Dr. Hong and tell them I am letting go as instructed.

Dr. Hong even emailed me last night. She told me that I shouldn't worry about the progesterone and to just stop taking it. She told me if this baby is meant to fight and be here, he'll stay. She told me to have faith that God is doing what God planned to do. It's in his hands.

I'm letting go today. I'm not giving up. I'm choosing to stop trying to keep an angel on Earth.

We love you baby and we always will.

At this point in my life, I'm ready to never forget but move on.

I love my husband so ridiculously much. I plan to just hold him tighter than ever before and tell him how much I appreciate him. I'm so, so lucky to have him in my life.

Our journey continues...